I just posted this as a reply to someone's comment on the HisColdFeet.com forum, and thought it would be good to share here too. I must figure out how to "feed" text from blog to forum, forum to blog.....
Here it goes:
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The whole thing about pre-engagement limbo is about what happens when a woman is ready for marriage before her boyfriend is ready to pop the question. Communication, sharing, honesty, and Understanding are so important to help get through it. So important to see how most women and men can be programmed differently when it comes to the "M" word. And, with that said, seeing how the boyfriend handles this stage will give you great insight and information about who this guy really is. His reactions and behaviors will help you tell if he's genuinely being fair and honest about his jitters and how he feels about marriage and your relationship ---- or if he's stringing you along and is up to no good.
Was recently at dinner with friends, and one couple shared about their pre-engagement days. The husband said about his wife, "She never made me feel like I was the end-all-be-all of her existence. She didn't think that I was the Only guy for her. And she knew she wanted to get married, so I knew I had to get my act together. Because if I didn't, then she'd end up with someone else who did."
Mar 22, 2008
Mar 5, 2008
10 Quick Tips for the woman who wants to tie the knot....
Ten Quick Tips for the woman who wants to tie the knot with the guy who wants to talk about it later:
1. Remember - most guys want to get married, they just want to put it off for as long as they can.
2. Make sure you and your boyfriend are on the same page about marriage, children, etc. - Let him know where you stand - and clearly!
3. Stop dropping those daily hints about marriage - plan a really good heart to heart chat instead.
4. When it comes to marriage understand how women and men can be programmed differently (no one ever said, "diamonds are a man's best friend).
5. Most guys think about the "Bigger Better Deal" - so try not to take it too personally.
6. His hesitancy does not necessarily mean rejection.
7. Try not to compare the pace of your relationship to all the friends who are getting married --- how quickly a couple gets engaged does not reflect the quality of the relationship.
8. Be in touch with why you want to get engaged right now at this time in your relationship.
9. Give yourself an ultimatum instead of putting one on him.
10. Know When to Keep Him and Know When It's Time to Sweep Him!
And if there were a number 11, of course it would be, "Pick up a Copy of HIS COLD FEET" - it'll help!
1. Remember - most guys want to get married, they just want to put it off for as long as they can.
2. Make sure you and your boyfriend are on the same page about marriage, children, etc. - Let him know where you stand - and clearly!
3. Stop dropping those daily hints about marriage - plan a really good heart to heart chat instead.
4. When it comes to marriage understand how women and men can be programmed differently (no one ever said, "diamonds are a man's best friend).
5. Most guys think about the "Bigger Better Deal" - so try not to take it too personally.
6. His hesitancy does not necessarily mean rejection.
7. Try not to compare the pace of your relationship to all the friends who are getting married --- how quickly a couple gets engaged does not reflect the quality of the relationship.
8. Be in touch with why you want to get engaged right now at this time in your relationship.
9. Give yourself an ultimatum instead of putting one on him.
10. Know When to Keep Him and Know When It's Time to Sweep Him!
And if there were a number 11, of course it would be, "Pick up a Copy of HIS COLD FEET" - it'll help!
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